GRR! My camera has really left me upset this day. It will not take photos with a flash, it will not zoom-in, but I have been able to do flashless, in-focus pictures outside. Now that is not even happening. I am at a loss... I think it is because it has had over 10,000 images taken with it and is just losing function. Still though... Sad!
So, most of you probably know although Matt and I have kept it quiet... he was fired Friday. What a smack in the face. This time, I feel, very sad for Matt and at the point of anger of the guy who owns UMA. Matt finished the project- it needs to be painted- and he was fired.
The infuriating aspect is that it was done. That we were supposed to (finally) get health insurance and that Matt had been promised a raised at the end of the project. The fact that he was fired left me feeling like the breath had been knocked from me.
There is real concern for me here... considering that this is the fourth time... Considering that yes, I do have a great job that starts in August, but since I work 9 of 12 months, my salary is not stellar (though much better than before) and I have no plans to be the provider for our family long-term. I took this job as a "do what I have to for now" sort of thing.
We really need clear direction as to how best to move forward. Both of us have individually felt the best way to not allow this to happen again is to open a business. Matt absolutely DOES take a "long" time to do things, but to his credit, he is meticulous. The problem is, he is meticulous to a fault in the eyes of an employer. The only way for this to not be an issue is for Matt to be his own boss (well, he and I), I am certain. The impression has been undeniable. However, figuring out what to do with this is what needs to be determined next.
In other (sad) news (what a weekend)....
I found out 2 Mondays ago I was pregnant. Of course, I was of mixed feelings about this since we have no insurance and honestly, since Asher is such a handful... but I started getting really excited about it in the last several days. We told Valerie, Jennifer and Debby. This morning, we were just talking about boy -v- girl, names, where "the baby" would sleep...
I am miscarrying. The interesting thing was that I actually saw the embryonic sac. I am a developmental embryologist by training, so I spent a lot more time than a normal miscarrying mother inspecting it. I even called Matt in. Sad. This is our SIXTH miscarriage (for one pregnancy that ended with an Asher). I have protectively sort of been like, "oh, well..." but it really is sad. Maybe some day in the future...
anyway, we just wanted you all to know what is going on and I do not feel like putting it on my blog since I have so many frequenters (which is why I added ads to my blog)...
Here is the thing, though:
My best friends had to have their baby delivered by c section Friday because of pre-ecclampsia and something (scarier) called HELLP. They had been medically controlling it for four weeks, so the baby (Madison) had be administered four doses of steriods. It was looking incredible, because Madison started kicking and screaming at birth. That is unheard of in a 25 weeker. Clearly, the steriods really helped speed her lung development. Instead of a ventilator, "all" the needed was a CPAP to keep positive pressure in her lungs.
Well, last night, the NICU ( army hospital, Hawaii ) had to intervene to save Maddi... Come to find out, the blood pressure-lowering medications to control the pre-ecclampsia Krissy was given decreased flow to her placenta. What that meant is that the baby was getting much less reduced blood flow. That caused her GI tract to start dying and decaying. Also, in 4 weeks, she did not grow at all.
It is a horrifying nightmare. As you can imagine, this can get bad quickly. Please pray for this family. They really had to work to get this baby and with all the complications, Krissy and Joel decided to have a tubal ligation at c-section.
This all made Matt's job loss seem almost... Not as serious. I found out she was going to be born about 5 minutes before I got home from Asher's photoshoot where Matt told me he had been fired. It was not good, but it seemed so small in comparison to the imminent birth of a baby 25 weeks gestationally... but my miscarriage feels all the more sad. One thing I plan on asking my Heavenly Father about is why these things happen. It is so hard on us mommies...
Well, last night, the NICU ( army hospital, Hawaii ) had to intervene to save Maddi... Come to find out, the blood pressure-lowering medications to control the pre-ecclampsia Krissy was given decreased flow to her placenta. What that meant is that the baby was getting much less reduced blood flow. That caused her GI tract to start dying and decaying. Also, in 4 weeks, she did not grow at all.
It is a horrifying nightmare. As you can imagine, this can get bad quickly. Please pray for this family. They really had to work to get this baby and with all the complications, Krissy and Joel decided to have a tubal ligation at c-section.
This all made Matt's job loss seem almost... Not as serious. I found out she was going to be born about 5 minutes before I got home from Asher's photoshoot where Matt told me he had been fired. It was not good, but it seemed so small in comparison to the imminent birth of a baby 25 weeks gestationally... but my miscarriage feels all the more sad. One thing I plan on asking my Heavenly Father about is why these things happen. It is so hard on us mommies...
I hope you all had a great fourth. Ours was good. We even had a sparkler-induced grass fire.
1 comment:
I'm praying for all of you. Keep us updated on Maddi!
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